I happened to try the foundation while I was in San Jose with my younger brother. He wanted to do a photo shoot with me so he could beef up his “head shot” portfolio, so I immediately went into “crazy stylist” mode.  There was NO WAY I was going to have photos of myself on his website without making a decent attempt to look GOOD.  Unfortunately, in REAL LIFE, I wear tinted moisturizer with SPF or just sunscreen with a little concealer (less is more, ladies! less is MORE.), so I don’t ever have “photoshoot” makeup in my arsenal of products. My brother rented this “paparazzi” camera that takes such hi res photos, you can zoom in and see the individual threads in my shirt! I didn’t need to see inside my pores.  This was obviously a “problem” a trip to Target couldn’t fix, so off we went.

I skipped anything with a sunscreen.  Normally, I would NOT advocate this AT ALL (sunscreen is the best way to keep your skin young. Well, that and not smoking), but for professional photography, this is a good idea.  Foundations with sunscreen usually have a shiny or oiler finish (which you would either minimize with a finishing powder or just leave for a “dewy” look in “real life”), and I wanted a matte “natural” look with any “dewy-ness” coming from highlighter creme.  There were only 2 products in the entire beauty department that were advertised as “matte”: Maybelline Dream Matte Mousse and Rimmel Stay Matte Clarifying Foundation. I normally would not recommend relying on how a product is advertised or what a label says because there is no regulation on the claims on product labeling, but I in this case, I didn’t have time for proper research and I was looking for a product for (what I thought would be) a one-off use.  I bought both the Maybelline and Rimmel foundations and ended up using a combo of the two for the photographs.  I didn’t think I personally looked too good (I guess I watched all those hours of “America’s Next Top Model” for nothing!),  but I did like my makeup.

What I LOVE about Dream Matte Mousse is it’s texture and light-medium coverage.  It’s fluffy, smooth and so very blendable on the skin and gives a beautiful, long-wearing, matte finish. Seriously, I put this on in the morning and it looks great at 5pm.  I decided to try to concealer because of this and it too gives excellent, smooth coverage under my eyes and doesn’t migrate into my fine lines. And it’s about $8 a product.  LOVE IT!  The only downside is that neither product has sunscreen. Obviously, adding sunscreen would totally destroy the silky, matte finish.  My solution to this problem is commuting to work wearing my usual sunscreen and once at work, I wipe down my face and apply the foundation and concealer.  Since I sit in a cube, away from any windows, and rarely leave the office during daylight hours, this is completely ok.  Otherwise, sunscreen stays on my face.

So there you have it. My discovery of the Holy Grail of makeup.  My undereye circles don’t stand a chance.

First, I should fill you all in on what I’ve been up to so far this year.  Well, like everyone else, I survived the dreary winter.  Just barely.  My psoriasis got so bad, that as usual, I thought I’d crawl out of my skin. And my motivation to wear nice clothes was completely zapped.  I think I only wore gray, black and navy blue for the first 3 months of this year.  Hooray for the Spring and the sun.  Second, I took a very quick trip to Cinequest, in San Jose, CA for my younger brother’s movie premiere (The movie is “Cost of a Soul” and it’s pretty amazing, FYI).  Um…yeah.  Apparently black skinny jeans, blue and gold open toe platform stillettos and a fabulous vintage (circa 1985) fuschia suit jacket complete with shoulder pads was a little too much New York amazingness for Northern Cali. I can’t believe the STARES I got from all those crunchy hippies!  Do they not sell InStyle there on the Left Coast or something? Luckily, I know how to own my fireceness, especially in that hot mess of Birkenstocks and North Face fleeces.  Finally, I started taking German classes.  This has nothing to do with outer beauty, fashion or makeup, but being open-minded and worldly is always “beautiful”.  My favorite word is “ die Schlampe”, which means, “slut”, as in “Tchüss, Schlampe!” (Bye, slut!”) or “Das tut mir leid, Schalmpe” (I’m sorry, Slut).  If you’re like me and identify with the likes of Eric Cartmann (of “South Park” fame) and Chelsea Handler, this is obviously a very handy word.

So what to expect this Spring from the Nouveau Yuppie?  The usual product reviews, rants and raves about the antics of the fashion and beauty industry player, and observations and advice to help you be your most fierce and fabulous selves.  And if I’m feeling really daring, I might start doing “how-to” videos or maybe even “v-logs.” (I hope I used that term correctly.  I’m not exactly “up” on anything related to technology and it’s many uses. I just got a new MacBook when my iBook from 2004 was no longer compatible with iTunes, Firefox, Internet Explorer, etc.)  Don’t worry, y’all.  I have too much of an attitude problem to do my vids “Laura Luke” style. So stay tuned and let’s hope I don’t get lazy again.  XOXO

So, CVS was having “Buy One, Get One Free” on all Revlon makeup.  Nice. Sold.  And wow! They have a 2-pack of the new Colorstay Ultimate Liquid Lipstick!  I picked up the 2-pack of “#1 Nude” and “Brilliant Bordeaux”.  For my “free” product, I opted for Colorstay Lip Liner in Nude.  I could hardly wait for my lipstick to never fall off.

The day after Thanksgiving, I decided to wear “#1 Nude” to my dad’s house for my family’s Thanksgiving dinner of Chinese take-out.  (We did that this year because everyone was in various directions on Thanksgiving).  I eagerly ripped off the plastic wrap on the tube, untwisted the cap and applied. Ohhh, very nice and silky application.  Cool. Check myself in the mirror and like the color. A good nude, perhaps a little to brown for me, but still, a nice neutral.   Within 20 minutes, however, my satisfaction with this product quickly dwindled.  My lips felt as dry as the Sahara.  I started licking them and (stupidly) re-applied the lipstick.   Well, my the end of the afternoon, the color was still there, but too bad my lips were so dry that there was literally nothing I could do to make them feel better.   I spent the entire weekend applying everything from Chapstick, to Smith’s Rosebud Salve, to regular old olive oil.   I even tried to exfoliate away the dry skin with an olive oil and sugar scrub, but it was as if the skin on my lips was permanently going to stay…taught and dry.   It was not until Tuesday that my lips stopped feeling so awful.  Yeah, so I do not recommend this product…unless you want to spend a few days licking your lips.

I’ve known since approximately June of this year that Jimmy Choo would be doing a line for H&M; however, I tried not to care too much since I remember the war-like atmosphere when Roberto Cavalli’s line launched last year.  (Women were literally ripping clothes out of each other’s hands. If you were not there when the store opened and ready to battle the all the underfed New York fashionistas, you got NOTHING.  I showed up 2 hours after the H&M on 51st and 5th opened and the place was ransacked.) As November 14 (the Jimmy Choo for H&M launch date) approached, I started seeing ad’s and snippets in all the fashion mags about how exciting it would be to get a pair of Jimmy Choo’s for $129.  Exciting indeed, but I am too old, broke and swamped at work to do battle over footwear.  So even when I passed the H&M on 51st and 5th (located conveniently down the block from my office) and saw the red carpet and velvet rope being set-up on November 13, I decided that I just “didn’t care” because sleep was far more important than waiting outside at 6am for a pair of shoes. (I know, I can’t believe I had that thought either.)  I figured that I’d “stop in” on Sunday before work and see if anything was left and also worth buying.

Sunday evening rolls around and I decided to take a break from the monotony that is my job and walk over to H&M. I was fully expecting to enter the eye of a tornado, but instead the people traffic was like any other day. And the Jimmy Choo items were fully stocked! Sizes and variety galore. I grabbed the black, long-sleeved, low v-back dress with crystals ($129) and the black tunic with what looked to be a geometric-ish urban skyline with stars overhead ($99).  Cute!  And I also grabbed two bags, a small, black  shoulder bag ($99) and a larger tote with faux snake skin trim ($149).  But where were the shoes?  I figured they were all sold out. Wrong. I walked into the back of the store, and the area around the registers was gated off and turned into a self-serve shoe salon.  Women were given 15 minutes to try on and pay for their shoes.  Nice. And the line wasn’t even that long, so I queued up in great anticipation.  Once inside the “shoe salon” I tried on the blue metallic heels with a pretty weaved pattern up the back and around the ankle.  Nah. Made my legs looks short(er).  Next, a pair of zebra printed heels that were essentially a boot with the toe and middle cut out, with a 1/2 inch platform ($129).  Finally, a strappy, red patent platform heel. ($99).  Hot. I felt like a classy stripper.  Sold.  With 2 minutes to spare, I got in line to pay for my new shoes.  I wasn’t necessarily ”in love” with the shoes, but they’re JIMMY CHOO’S, so I decided to fork over the $240 for them.  A note on the fit: I am normally a size 6.5 to 7, BUT these shoes were so big, I ended up buying shoes marked size 5.

Next, tried on the dress and the tunic. WTF?  Why is everything in this line so damn BIG?!  I really WANTED both items, but the dress was just too big. The low v-back was just ill-fitting and I have broad shoulders from gymnastics! You’d think I’m manage to fill out an x-small at H&M!  The tunic was just too long. I blame that on being short, but regardless, it didn’t look “right”.  So sad. I REALLY wanted both items!! As for the bags, I decided that I 40 bags was enough and I probably had a black leather bag buried somewhere in my closet.

As I walked out of the store with my giant, sapphire blue carrier bag with “Jimmy Choo for H&M” embossed in silver across it, I felt super cool,  like I was “special” for managing to score a piece this “limited edition” “one-off” line. I could feel people staring at me as I walked down 51st street. Yes. I know you are all jealous.  At least, this is what I kept telling myself.

However, like anything that sucks you in with its onslaught of advertising, fancy packaging and luxury name association, you still have to be a responsible consumer.  I got back to my office and opened the box to the zebra shoes.  WHOA!  I was so wrapped up on the excitement of actually GETTING a pair of these shoes that I didn’t notice the smell of…what IS THAT?!…paint thinner? glue? Wow. Both shoes reeked of this chemical smell so much that I couldn’t even take them out of the box without wanting to faint! Upon further inspecting, I also determined that while the shoes might have a “Jimmy Choo” label on them, they are of equal quality to Aldo and Nine West.  Granted, I KNOW that it’s “Jimmy Choo for H&M”, but $240 is a lot money. I could get pretty nice shoes for that kind of dough at Macy’s or Bloomingdale’s.

In the end, I just thought that the “Jimmy Choo for H&M” line was nice in concept and LOOKED very pretty, but when you tried on the clothes or shoes, you realized that it was probably not much better quality than the regular stuff H&M sells everyday. And for the prices , you could get some much better quality items.  I really tried to convince myself to keep these shoes, but on Monday, I walked down the block to H&M, and returned them.  I suppose if I had a TON of disposable income, I’d have kept them as a fun fashion “souvenir” of sorts, BUT in this economy and with my bad knees and Achilles tendonitis, I just don’t think I have a place in my closet for 5 inch stilettos.  Well, I do, just not ones that smell like glue.

I’m all for being ethical and having journalistic integrity, but this is just silly.  So what if someone writes a favorable review of something they got for free? Yes, it’s possibly misleading if you don’t know they got it for free, but so much of advertising is full of misleading or totally unsubstantiated crap that there should be a crackdown on advertising ads and magazines before they start going after people who write product reviews on their blog sites.  Take the beauty industry for example.  There is an article in the New York Times today talking about huge sales in “night” serums and creams.  A lot of the advertising basically is selling the IDEA that your skin “rests” at night and that it does it’s repairing when you sleep, so you should buy X “night” cream/serum to maximize your skin’s “nocturnal” repair processes….blah, blah, blah.  Really? I’m sure that like any other organ in your body, your skin needs sleep too, but these ads make it seem like something magical happens at night and you’ll “awaken” to younger skin in the morning.  Yeah, we’ve ALL seen those ads on TV and in print.  And then they tell you about their new “XX-plex” , but they can’t disclose ANY of their “clinical” research or what’s in ”XX-plex” because it’s  a “proprietary” formula AND they don’t want to FDA on their ass.  Shouldn’t that sort of advertising be more tightly regulated? I know the FDA and the FTC are two separate agencies, but as I’ve been saying, aren’t there bigger fish to fry than bloggers or any poor soul who writes a product review?  I know this new regulation doesn’t apply to everybody, or even a majority or a large minority, but imagine doing nothing wrong and getting investigated? What a pain! 

Anyway, I just had to rant because, well, this is a blog where I review products.  I do promise to disclose if I received a product for free, if I ever get one, but not because I might receive and $11,000 fine if I don’t, but because I have integrity.

Now, don’t get me wrong. We have some pretty awesome products here in the U.S.  and most international products are easily be purchased here (especially if you live in a major metro area) or over the internet.  My excitement merely comes from getting my hands on products that no one else can have unless they go to Europe (or Asia or wherever your coveted product resides).  People have this reaction to cars, clothes, accessories, and even people (c’mon, how much more intriguing does someone with an accent seem?).  Well, for product whores like myself, I get excited over hard-to-find and inaccessible products or when I come across new lines of makeup or skin and body care.  Nothing is more thrilling than feeling like you are privy to things that other people are not.  Of course, it’s also super annoying when your fav cult product or brand becomes so popular you can buy it on QVC or Walmart OR (even worse) the original product formulas are changed for the worse to accomodate the larger demand and distribution.  Case in point: The Body Shop’s Body Butter. I remember when it first came out. It was practically all shea butter and only had one scent: mango.  In the jar, it was a little hard like the shell on a creme brulée, but the moment you touched it to your skin, it melted like…BUTTER, hence the name.  You would get such a nice, greasy coating on your skin that mositurized like NOTHING ELSE. At the time, I was a springboard diver so any moisture I could get my hands on was a relief for my chlorine exposed skin.  Then they started introducing more scents. Then the worst happened: they changed the formula, which is now more a thick lotion than a butter.  I’ve since slowly lost my love affair with the Body Shop and it’s body butter.  So sad, but I digress…

Anyway, making my list of products I needed Hans to get me was difficult,  until I spotted a can of L’Oreal’s Elnette Hairspray as I was browsing the hair care aisle at Target.  I remembered all the hoopla over Elnette becoming available in the U.S. and how excited the “beauty” and “fashion” worlds were. One “little” caveat: the product sold in the U.S. wasn’t the original formula that has become a cult favorite.  Well, I just HAD to have a can from Europe.  After all,  I’m from New Jersey and we take our hairspray very seriously.   Mental note: email Hans about Elnette.

And then it hit me like a ton of bricks:  La Roche Posay sunscreens! When Mexoryl was FINALLY approved by the FDA a few years ago, I could not wait for La Roche Posay’s Anthelios sunscreen to become available at my local Duane Reade.  I am a sunscreen devotee, to say the least and am always looking for the best formula’s out there.  Unfortunately, only a few of La Roche Posay’s formulations are available here, so I “requested” (i.e. gently demanded) that Hans bring me one or several formulas I found intriguing on the company’s German site, namely the gel and the children’s formulations.  (I don’t know a word of German, but miraculously became fluent enough to decipher exactly which products I “needed” to have.  See, being a beauty addict can be edifying as well as beautifying).

Finally, Hans had arrived AND he remembered to bring me my products! I shrieked when he presented me with a can of Elnette and a bottle of La Roche Posay’s ”Dermo-Kids Sonnenschutz-Milch für empfindliche Kinderhaut”, basically, SPF 50 milk formulation for children.  “OH MY GOD! YOU’RE THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER!”  You’d think the guy had just given me a 10 carat Harry Winston.  After getting over my initial excitement, I learned that there is more than one variety of Elnette or “something for old ladies” as Hans referred to it.  The Elnette myth was totally misleading (as most myths are)! How can ”they” talk of the “original formula” when there is apparently an entire section of it! Hans was a little daunted by the selection (seeing how I made it seem like there was only ONE type of Elnette), much like Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade when he had to select the Holy Grail.  Luckily, my boy chose ” the one for colored hair”. Translation: it’s made for color-treated hair.  He “chose wisely” and I was actually quite impressed that he picked that instead of “extra hold” or whatever else was available.

So is the original (or at least this version) Elnette everything it’s hyped up to be?  I think it is.  Not sticky and indeed does brush out without leaving flakes or crunchiness, but still manages to give a nice, medium hold.  I love it and when I go to Germany in December, I will have to check out the other varieties.

And what about my La Roche Posay?  I can’t WAIT to start using it as soon as I finish up my current tube of sunscreen.  Then I can say, “Oh I just LOVE La Roche Posay! I mean, the stuff here is great, but I use one that’s only available in Europe…It was a gift from my boyfriend.” Wink, smile, feel special…until it becomes available at CVS.

My need to never be with out my “Coiff Bouffant Spray” made me realize that I very rarely re-purchase a product.  This mostly happens with makeup since I like to pretend I’m up on the trends and you have to throw out everything within a year or less of opening it (the turnover time is practically an inviataion for me to try all the new products that are launched evey week!), but it does happen with skin care and hair products too.  It absolutely amazes me that I have friends who just keep buying the same exact makeup, face lotion, shampoo, etc.  I’m not being judgmental, but with all the fun and amazing products out there, why would you just stick to the same stuff?

Then I realized that I’ve been buying the same face serum for the last year.  That is a record for me.  But it’s nothing compared to my all-time record holder: Biolage Smoothing Shine Milk.  I’ve been using it for 5 years, ever since I got a full-size bottle of it in a gift with purchase (of a full-price bag) from Kenneth Cole.  And with the Bouffant Spray, my hair is so perfect I don’t even have the words to describe it.  

Even product whores can find love and commit themselves to products, at least until they get discontinued or “improved”.  So here’s my list of my fav products that always have a place on my dresser:

1). Biolage Smooting Shine Milk

2). Fekkai Coiff Bouffant Texturizing Spray

3). Dior Show Mascara in Black – Best mascara EVER. Makes my lashes so thick I look like I’m wearing falsies. No flaking, no “Tammy Faye” effect. Just amazing lush lashes.

4). The Body Shop bath gloves – I haven’t showered without these in 7 years. My skin is as smooth (except for the psoriasis bits) as a baby’s bottom.

5). Chanel Nail Polish – I just love getting one or two of each season’s new colors. 

6). Olay Regenerist Daily Fragrance Free Regeneration Serum – I’m so convinced that my skin looks younger and has less lines because of this.

7). Neutrogena Ageless Intestives Deep Wrinkle Eye Cream – I’m totally convinced my undereye circles have faded and I have less wrinkles around my eyes because of this product. Retinol is your friend.

8). Shu Uemura Eyelash Curler – Hands down the best curler out there. I’ve tried a bunch, and this handles the best for a perfectly curled set of lashes.  Don’t waste your money on another brand. 

9). Mally Beauty Cancellation Concealer System – one compact has a cream concelaer and the other has a coordinating finishing powder.  Blends easily and can be applied with a finger or with the brush provided.  I even use it on my psoriasis patches around my hairline.  So perfect for that.

10).  M.A.C. Cleanse Off Oil – I’ve been using this stuff for over 3 years.  It breaks down every last stitch of eye makeup.  I used to use it with a cotton ball, but now I just use two pumps into my hand and massage in circular motions all over my face and lids/lashes and rinse off. 

There you have it, folks: The products I can’t live without.  It’s rare, but even product whores needs a little continuity and stability in their lives.  It keeps us grounded.  As we scour the aisles of drugstores and wander the counters at departments stores looking for the perfect “something”, we know that we can skip the fancy new face cream or amazing new hair product because we’ve already got a bottle (or more) of our perfect match waiting for us at home.

I don’t dress very nice, according to my boss.

Usually we are in jeans and t-shirts at the office (this is how it’s been in the last two offices i’ve worked in).

Today we had a business lunch (which i probably had no business going to, but that’s another story), i was asked to dress in business casual. I came to work dressed in blue slacks (from Banana Republic(they’re a little dated)) and a sleeveless sweater (that i just got from the gap, like  a month ago) with a black cropped cardigan and some brown (pretty stylie) Campers.

As soon as my boss saw me, he said you were supposed to dress in business casual…. am i miss informed that my outfit was not business casual? 

Wiki informs me that business casual for women is a skirt or slacks and a collared shirt/polo/sweater.

After lunch he told me (and i know he wasn’t trying to be mean) that he thought i needed nicer clothes. What? I feel like i spend a ton of money on nice clothes… so much to the point that my friends here would always make fun of how nice i dress.  The girl we went to lunch with was basically wearing the same thing, but wore heels and her blouse was shiny and frilly. 

i haven’t had to really dress up for work in a while, so maybe i’m a bit out of practice. But i just don’t quite understand where he is coming from. I know my choices of clothes tend to be more on the conservative side, but does that equal not nice?

i know you can’t see my outfit today, i know you know i don’t dress like a slob. Am i just delusional?

i’m upset by this. i feel like i’ve had a big blow to my ego. 

and they hella don’t pay me enough to be able to go out this weekend to spruce up my wardrobe.

Not only did she revolutionize women’s fashion for all time (yeah right we’re going to go back to wearing corsets, mutton-leg sleeves, bustles and ankle-length skirts!), but she was also ambitious, strong-willed, independent and created an empire that still bears her name today.  

Being the Chanel fanatic that I’ve become, I of course dragged my boyfriend, whom I shall call “Hans” (He is German, afterall.) to see “Coco Avant Chanel” starring Audrey Tatou. As the title indicates, it’s about Chanel’s early life before she became the Queen of Fashion.  She was so stubborn and feisty!  She fashioned her lover’s shirts into lovely outfits for herself and rode horses like a man (you know, one leg on each side).   She left the comfort of being a rich man’s mistress (a goal for many women of poorer backgrounds) to start her business in Paris.  What an amazing life she led.  I want to be just like her.

So now, when I get up in the morning and dress myself for work, I try to think: What would Coco wear?  My long strand of pearls has gotten much use since I’ve become cuckoo for Coco.

Jenna, I may not be able to hold your hair back as you puke (just like college!) or massage your back when it aches (that’s what husbands are for!), but I can help you navigate your way through the world of cosmetics so you can look and feel your best and be the sexy momma I know you already are.  Mazel Tov beytoch!

Here’s a list of “healthy” products for anyone expecting or just looking for ways to eliminate some ”nasties” from their beauty regimen:

1). Korres Cherry Full Color Gloss: Comes in a wide variety of colors and smells faintly of, you guessed it, cherries.

2). Bare Escentuals bareMinerals SPF 15 Foundation:  The most popular of all the mineral foundations out there seems to have improved their formula and removed the parabens (I recall seeing parabens in them a few years ago).  Great, buildable coverage and a wide range of colors. 

3). Tarte Cheek Stain in Blushing Bride: This is the only color I would recommend from this line because it doesn’t have any shimmer in it. Actually, I correct myself, I think Flush is another non-shimmer color that is flattering on just about everyone.  Cheek stains I find a better than powders because they last longer and don’t require a brush.

4). Tarte Lights, Camera, Splashes! Waterproof Mascara: I’m a fan of waterproof mascara in general, but with all those extra hormones racing, it’s probably a good idea to rock the waterproof in case you get teary-eyed while in a staff meeting or typing a memo.

5). Belli Skin Care: A bath and body line designed for pregnant women. Megan at Luxe highly recommended the Elasticity Belly Oil because she found that being very pregnant during the winter made the skin on her belly flake off and itch like crazy and this was the only thing that would help her with the flaking and the itchiness.  She also recommends the Pampered Pregnancy Body Wash and the Acne Clearing Facial Wash, which contains lactic acid instead of the usual salicylic acid, a no, no during pregnancy. 

To those of you reading this who aren’t expecting anything more than that raise you’re never getting, you can use these products too!